Me me me

Brilliant advice from all of you, as always. Thank you so much...update to come concerning the boy's renewed interest in reading, but I don't feel like writing about my children today, I want to write about me. It's all about me.

Me me me me me.

I received the viewing/reading list for my screenwriting course and am using the next two weeks to try and cram in the whole semester's worth, before classes begin. As a mother (albeit with kids who are teenagers) I still have a mortal fear of "unexpected family commitments which invariably occur on the week/day/night before an assignment is due and which lead to my failing a course/losing a job/going crazy."

Of course, my current anxiety level can never compare to that excruciating feeling I used to have when I had finally set up my dream job/dream course only to then have to juggle the relentless unexpected realities of real life with small children.

There was, for example, the university course which had me sobbing in the timetable coordinator's office while explaining that no, I could not wait for him to give me my time-table for next semester NEXT semester because my baby's daycare required a term's notice NOW. I remember, as if it was yesterday, that horrible Kafkaesque feeling as I sat before this elderly male professor, heaving and hiccuping and ranting on and on and on about my little boy's daycare arrangements, my girl's school which finishes at 3, my husband's business travel arrangements for the next year, my parents' home in faraway England, the debilitating boredom of housework, the flu that I couldn't seem to shake, and the fact that I hadn't slept through the night in 2 years.

Good times, good times.

The one thing to remember with parenting - everything always changes. So here I am about to embark on a course of study which promises to be both enjoyable and challenging. In preparation for the first class I watched "Fight Club" and the pilot episode of "Sopranos," and then I read the script of "The Full Monty." How do you like that for homework? Come on people, I just know that you'll have opinions on those three. I had watched the two films before, many years ago, but I had never watched any Soprano episode. How has this been possible? I'm ashamed of myself, I missed out on years of enjoyment. That first episode is beautiful, really, it's beautiful - Dr. Melfi the psychiatrist trying to get Tony to understand why he had an anxiety attack after the ducklings from his pool finally flew away? That scene sums up what I love about the role of film in our lives, it makes life worth living, it makes me happy. Or how about that scene in which Tony tells his wife Carmella that he's seeing a therapist and she's so happy that she practically dances a jig there in the restaurant and she tells him "That's so gutsy." Ohohoh, and the scene in the other restaurant when he bumps into Dr. Melfi and he thanks her for her help with the "interior decoration." I'll stop now.

What's the general opinion about "Fight Club"? I tell you what, it's different to watch it after 9/11, you know, (**spoiler alert) the ending scene in which he and Marla stand at the window and watch the huge buildings explode? The fight scenes still make me very queasy, but I think I understand the film more at this stage of my life, when I have more experience with men and their inner lives. It's a classic.

I've been told that there will be only 10 students in my class, 5 men and 5 women, mostly late 20s and early 30s so I'll be the oldest. You want to come along with me? Shhh...if you stay very quiet you can come along with me, all right? Hey Kim, would you please STOP shoving Eurolush outta the way? There'll be plenty of room for ALL of you, I promise. Oh, but Lushy....you'll need to wear something other than pyjamas. Really.