Film School Rant

One of my teachers uses the F-word a lot and it's driving me INSANE. It's a WRITING course, he should have enough words in his vocabulary other than F. Also, I was brought up to think that it's rude, and I can't help losing all respect for a TEACHER when he uses it so casually. Why can't my teacher be like Alice's Geography professors? I bet Alice never has to put up with this sort of unprofessional foul-mouthed immaturity.

I have two teachers who teach us side-by-side for most of the time, but I don't think they're well-matched. They often seem to misunderstand each other, they argue about trivialities while we sit and listen, and there's a lot of ego involved. There's so much ego in the room when they teach that it's physically painful, I can see their low self-esteems and wounded children battling each other as they discuss the Act Two turning point of Jaws, and it's ugly.

It is much harder than I had expected to tolerate a 22 year old man's view on the world when you are forced to sit beside him from 9am to 5pm for 4 days in a row. I didn't say a WORD, I swear, when he presented "Point Break" to the class and explained why it was "heaps good". But when I had to be involved in a group discussion of "Dirty Dancing" and he said that it was a failure of a movie because the stakes weren't high enough (stop to take a breath) because "no father would really freak out that much if his daughter told him she had sex for the first time, I mean....she's like 17 right...it's not like she's 14" (another deep breath). Well. I couldn't hold back then and I spoke up. So there.

The guy whose ambition it is to be the youngest ever super-successful television writer? Well, he's now voicing concerns about how he might be setting himself up for a fall because people may assume that he's peaked early and not expect him to have a long-lasting career. Right.

I find myself sitting in that class and PINING, truly PINING for my blogging community. I sit there and I think of each and every one of you, every blogger and every commentbox I have ever read, and I wish that you were there beside me. I miss the meeting of like minds, the creativity, the humour, the respect, the love of life, the truthfulness of my little blogland. This transition into the real world has hit me hard I'm afraid.

Yes, it is 2am, yes, I am going to have some chamomile tea and then return to bed. Thanks for listening.

E xxxx

Film School requirements

Sorry I've been absent for a while. The teachers are really strict about the required attendance at all Handsome Men's Club meetings, and they meet daily.




Should you so desire, an entire meeting is available for viewing on Youtube. Don't worry, at least YOU won't have to write a paper on it.

Families

I've been thinking today about the television programmes which I loved when I was young, and they all seem to have one thing in common - families. They also have musical themes which instantly come back to me even after several decades.

The Brady Bunch, of course, but then also The Waltons, Eight Is Enough and...Bewitched too. I quickly googled them and I found myself physically reacting to the photos, I sighed out loud and laughed and clapped my hands. I even surprised myself by remembering the names of most of the kids from Eight is Enough, and by feeling as if I had actually known them, in real life, in my childhood.

I'm trying to come up with a logline for a television series, it's simply a group exercise my class will be doing next week, nothing huge. Yet, Eleanor being Eleanor (ugh, she does annoy me sometimes), she must insist on taking the task far too seriously. She must begin to wonder if any idea she comes up with can ever be high art enough for the discerning television viewer. She must worry that her fellow student writers will roll their eyes as she nervously mumbles through her pitch, stumbling over the words, blushing.

So thank goodness for my happy childhood and my wonderful memories of the television worlds I lived in.

Also, thank goodness for my real family which gathers around me at times like these and teases me and makes me laugh at the unhealthy and impossible standards I so often set myself.

I'm going to have some fun with this instead. I just have to tell Eleanor about it first. Wish me luck.

Solo

The last photo in this Journeymama post necessitated the writing of a poem. So here it is:

A POEM FOR A KING IN THE MAKING

(For Journeymama’s Solo, with love)

In fairytales
The kings and queens
Rule kingdoms
Far and wide,
With land long owned
And silver stowed
And knights who do
And die.

In battles long
The kingdom won
In castle
Made of stone,
The royal couple
Side by side
Are served a feast
Alone.

Beyond the walls,
Beyond the moat
Of water deep
And dark,
And further down
The tree-lined path
Which leads to woods
And grass,
Keep walking now
And there you’ll see
The subjects
One and all,
They wake and bake
And clean and make.
They’ll never
Rule the world.

Someone is king
And someone not,
All this you know
I’m sure.
Yet I’ll tell you
A different rule,
Which is not taught
At school.

A king’s true throne
And golden crown
Are never in
Full view,
They hide in letters,
Pictured poems,
They hide in psalms
And you.

For waking, baking,
Cleaning, making
Need not be done
Alone.
Just take your time
To look straight down
And notice
Golden curls,
And tiny hands
And dimpled elbows
Chubby, sunkissed
Feet
Which firmly stand
Upon the throne
Which helps him
Reach the treats.

The Oscars

I could go on and on about the Oscars, but my eyes are killing me and I'm tired, so I'll give you a quick list:

How cool is it that Kathryn Bigelow is the star of the day? How cool is it that a small film about the Iraq war should be so loved and so respected? Very. That's how.

Go read bb for a red carpet snark.

Go read this for a film industry insider snark too.

I LOVE Precious and Blind Side, but I really didn't think they'd be appreciated by the Academy. I was wrong! Woot!!!

I'm crushed that Best Costume didn't go to the Aussie who worked on Bright Star. Totally unfair.

I have a new favourite film. I only went to see it yesterday, and only because I had a feeling Jeff Bridges would win the Oscar and I wanted to be in the know. I was surprised people!!! AMAZED!!!! "Crazy Heart" is my new favourite film of the year!!!!!





And this is my new favourite jogging song:

List

Miss CB got her Ps today, which means she can now drive a car all by herself, alone.

I spent the morning watching "Alien" and compiling a beat sheet, which means that I wrote down every major change in plot as it occurred.

I have had blepharitis for many years and it has been under control until this past week. Major flare-up is sending me back to the ophthalmologist. It's a problem. May be connected to stress and watching endless hours of TV and film.

Anybody watching "The Good Wife"? I'm surprised at how compelling it is, I think I'm hooked.

I am completely and utterly addicted to "In Treatment". Five 20 minute episodes (which were apparently shown on cable Monday through Friday) following a psychologist and 4 different patients' sessions, with the 5th being his own session with a psychologist. Then they continue with those same patients for the entire season! Gabriel Byrne, I heart you (although Mr. CB is still my one and only true love. Ahem.).

I also have to do a beat sheet for "Finding Nemo." It's so beautifully structured.

A guy in one of my classes once said "I dare any one of you tell your friends that you're doing a beat sheet for Basic Instinct." Most paused film moment ever?! You know...Sharon Stone...OK...change of topic....

There's a guy in my class who's ambition is to be the youngest person to write a TV series, ever, in the world. I found that to be really sweet and funny.

I found the nanny next door sitting in her car and having a tiny little cry the other day. Both her charges have started going to preschool twice a week and she was missing them terribly. The nanny next door is a very special woman.

It is raining on my laundry. I can't be bothered reacting.

If you ever watch "The Queen" and see the screen saver on the menu think of my dog Blue....Helen Mirren is shown staring straight ahead with a very stern look in her eyes, and Blue totally freaked out and started whining and cowering. I swear he really did!

I'm attending a seminar with Jane Campion tomorrow morning and I'm trying to pretend that it's perfectly normal when inside I'm jumping up and down and running around like a maniac and whooping with excitement.

Rush

Ever since my screenwriting course started I've been in a rush, and I keep sitting down at my desk and starting a post only to find myself suddenly doing something quite different in a completely different location.

So I have decided this Friday morning to write a post in a rush, without reading through it and pondering anything whatsoever. Stream of consciousness. Sort of.

My course is great, but I'm completely out of my comfort zone because it's been quite a while since I spent so much time with people, talking. Sure, I have my part-time work, but a lot of it involves reading and writing by myself. If I have the choice between writing an essay or meeting someone in person for a chat I will always lean towards writing.

So there I was, spending three full days with 4 women, 5 men and our 2 teachers discussing the theory and practice of screenwriting. To cut a long story short (hehe, no pun intended) our first assignment is writing a tv pilot to a brief. After spending the last 10 years trying to eradicate the evil time-sucking, life-sucking television from my family life I am now embracing it with a passion.

My favourite show so far is Mad Men, especially the 1st season. Anybody else here love it? How about In Treatment? My guilty pleasure is actually Medium, anybody else out there like it?

I'm the oldest in the class, and the youngest members of the group (in their 20s) had a bit of a bet on how old I was! Their final guess was 32, SCORE!!!!!!!!!! (I'm 41).